December 2011

I lost Ortolini suddenly on December 4th. Two weeks later, Tim experienced an “incident” involving his heart. I thought I would lose him, too. I also began having visions while walking the three blocks to the nursery where I worked. Spontaneous creative imagery. Seeing with the mind’s eye. Mind-pops.

I remember roughly sketching these images but cannot for the life of me find them anywhere, so I will try to describe them. They were all holiday-themed.

  • One centered around cyclamen – which are popular around the holidays – against a black backdrop, assuming poses such as reclining. I actually replicated this one, complete with spotlight.
  • The other one I reproduced (due in no small part to the patience of our Houseplant Buyer, Julie) was Santa’s sleigh pulled by nine reindeer. I bought a small sleigh and used 4″ poinsettia for Santa and the reindeer, linking them together with ribbon.
  • Others which were not realized was a Swedish Christmas Chime using Delphiniums and a Menorah fashioned from succulents stationed on upside-down pots.

Finally, I had envisioned a box with a peephole through which one would see a small diorama comprised of plants.

It was absolutely INSANE but compelling because I had absolutely NO CONTROL over these “mind-pops”, which continued through the holidays into January of 2012. That month, Tim underwent defibrillator implant surgery. Shortly thereafter, these “visions” stopped. Just like that.

I’m no psychologist but I suspect these imaginative and unconventional surges were a coping mechanism. I guess I could’ve done worse, like abusing drugs or alcohol. I have no idea what my poor co-workers thought but I do owe them a huge debit of gratitude for being so patient with me.

ℳ –


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