Comedy in Place

Got a message from my favorite Engineer-turned-Über-Comedian, Don McMillan, announcing his “Comedy Show from Home”.

Good Afternoon!
The office of the CCO (Chief Comedy Officer) has a little comedy to help you get through the Day with a Laugh.

COMEDY IN PLACE
Don McMillan’s Comedy Show from Home

I’m “Sheltered in Place” so I’m introducing “Comedy in Place”! Just because we are “Sheltered in Place” doesn’t mean we can’t “Laugh in Place”! We need to laugh NOW more than EVER! Hopefully, I can help with that.

My plan is to post a video (almost) every day with one joke from my comedy notebooks that I hope is funny (since I can’t hear you laugh) AND a clip from a LIVE show (which I’m pretty sure is funny because people are laughing on the video). In either case, I hope I can supply some laughs to help you get through all the challenges we are facing right now. As my Mom always said, “This too shall pass.”

Click HERE or on the image below to check it out today’s video…

PLEASE SHARE! We ALL need laughs!

“Social Distancing?”, piece of cake.
We Engineers have been doing that for years.

Be Well. Be Safe. Keep Laughing,

Don McMillan
Your CCO (Chief Comedy Officer)

Don McMillan’s YouTube Channel (don’t miss a single episode of Comedy in Place!)

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HP Phones Home

Before I get going with this Post let me share a comedic graphic I posted last month:

‘Kayso, anyone who’s had to deal with Microsoft’s updates will recognize the ironic humor in that. However, waiting 30 minutes (and counting) is absolutely ridiculous! This is what I experienced last night when shutting down my laptop – these days one has no recourse but to update (when there’s an update) before shutting down Windows. (To make matters worse [as you’ll see] I had selected “Update and Restart” instead of “Update and Shutdown”, but it was too late to do anything about it.) I did not want to stay up waiting for the update to load for who knows how long, so I threw something over the screen and went to bed.

3:30 this morning I got up to visit the loo. Back in bed and just starting to doze off, my laptop “came to life”. Suddenly the whole room was lit-up by its screen. I jumped out of bed to see what the hell was going on. (Surely Windows wasn’t still updating…)

HP was updating the BIOS. I always shut-down my computers at night so I’ve never seen this sort of thing before and was understandably concerned. Was my HP laptop reaching out to its Mothership or was this some sort of nefarious activity? By now I was fully awake. I decided to wait and see what transpired…

Apparently, it was just an update of the laptop’s BIOS. However, Microsoft changed some of my settings (quelle surprise) such as reverting my browser-of-choice (Firefox) to their piece-of-shit browser, changing some of my “Open with” settings, etc. Typical Microsoft shit.

By the time I reset everything to MY liking, there was no way I was going back to sleep – tossing and turning until Ramses woke me. (Sleeps through the night until 6:30am. The cat’s a fucking alarm clock.) I see a nap in my future…that is, if “the Prince” will allow me to take one.

(The fact that my laptop phoned home still perturbs me.)

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Technology: Grammar, Punctuation, and Email Etiquette

I’m a wordsmith (look it up) – at least I like to think I am – which is why is takes me forever to construct a Post or Webpage. English was my strong suit in school and it was suggested that I go into journalism. (I didn’t listen, but I probably should’ve.) I’m also a self-described Thesaurus Rex.

thesaurus rex
n. a dinosaur who doesn’t attack people, only bombards you with words that all have
the same meaning until you kill yourself.

(from the Urban Dictionary)

I subscribe to a website called Word Genius that emails me daily newsletters filled with the meanings of unusual words and articles pertaining to etymology (not to be confused with entomology which is the study of insects), punctuation, sentence syntax, etc.

This week’s newsletters contained two interesting articles:

  1. 13 ways technology has changed language over the years
    This short article covers subjects such as:  emoticons (which I use s-p-ar-i-n-g-l-y [look it up] because I really dislike their overuse), ghosting, lack of punctuation, abbreviated words/phrases (lol, omg, wtf, etc – blame texting), etc.
    (BTW, I detest the “verb” texting, preferring instead to say “I sent someone a text.”)

    My favorite item dealt with Email etiquette. My tendency is to use proper English syntax even when writing casual emails to friends. This is not to say that I don’t misplace a comma or two (I like commas), but I massage (not message) emails almost as much as I do Posts.

    syntax
    n. the arrangement of words and phrases to create well-formed sentences in
    a language.

    This particular item contained a link to another article:  “15 Email Etiquette Rules Every Professional Should Follow“. Most of the bullet points were obvious no-brainers (!), however, one stood out:  11. Add the email address last. Brilliant idea! For those who are trigger-happy with the SEND button, this one will save you much tearing-out-of-hair and prevent your message from being sent to an unintended recipient.

  2. 9 grammar memes that will give you a good laugh today
    I am proud to call myself a “grammar Nazi”. It’s appalling how sentences are being constructed today – especially by the younger crowd – and the horrendous spelling! I really don’t know how these folks are going to make it in the world, unless of course they work for/with similarly inarticulate people.

    That said, here are a few of my favorite memes (look it up) that tackle the, apparently, sensitive subject of proper grammar (You can Google more right here):

  3. ’cause it references CAT… ≋;>

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Dead Pixels

BEFORE

Dead pixels…I understand they can happen with flat monitors. That fact doesn’t make them easier to live with – which is what I’ve been doing for a little over 2 years. During that time, more and more pixels have died over an exponentially larger area of my laptop’s monitor – ultimately making it difficult to see what I was typing.

Purchasing a newer laptop proved a daunting task. The ability to play CD’s and DVD’s is being “phased out” of their functionality. (Apparently, owning music/movies is not much in fashion these days…fuck that!) I did not want to purchase a separate unit to play a CD or watch a DVD, preferring to keep my desk clutter-free. However, the nice folks at Best Buy in Folsom showed me two such soon-to-be-phased-out laptops which they had in stock.

I am writing this Post from an HP 17.3″ Laptop (Intel Core i5 8th Generation, 8GB, 1TB hard drive, Windows 10 Home edition). It’s hella-fast and the resolution is amazingly sharp. Played a DVD without a hitch and watched a movie on the Netflix app. Have not had a chance to test a CD, but I have no doubt it will work wonderfully! Very pleased with both the quality and price – and I can see what I’m typing now!

AFTER

(Dontcha just LOVE my new Wallpaper…)

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